Monday, October 3, 2011

Full Capacity

Today I am blessed by the visit of Pete Ohs and his wife Andrea. Our family has known Pete since he was born and he has been my son Brian's best friend since pre-school days. Interestingly, they are both "middle children" and incredibly sensitive, creative human beings. Pete and Brian spent many of their school years together in journalistic endeavors; Brian mostly in print but some video and Pete mostly in video projects. They would talk endlessly about film and script writing. Some of their joint high school projects were quite hilarious and they dreamt about the day when they would make their mark on the film industry. I, too, wondered where all this creative energy would lead them (especially as they matured) and am amazed at the way their sensitive spirits are touching lives through their giftings.

What they are doing today astounds me and I could not have envisioned the lives they are leading. Which brings me to the point of this blog. How often do we limit people by our preconceived notions of what we think they should be like? Do we place expectations on people according to our perspectives or agendas?

One of my most glaring examples of imposing my agenda on Brian was during his first Christmas teaching overseas. Much to my dismay, Brian called home the day after Christmas. I was awaiting his phone call and I had been praying that he would connect with a loving family to celebrate the birth of Jesus. I was worried about how lonely he would be. When he finally did call, I was humbled by his Christmas day report. "Mom," he excitedly shouted in the phone (that's Brian, he gets louder when he gets excited) "I just had the best Christmas day in my whole life!" Hmmmm.... without his family? (This is what I selfishly thought.) Brian continued with exuberance, "I spent the day with a friend who is a recovering alcoholic and I helped him from relapsing. I helped him with his loneliness which kept him from taking a drink. It was the best Christmas ever!"

In one split second I was full of a Mother's pride and the Holy Spirit's conviction. And again I wonder, how often do I limit people by my preconceived notions of what I think they should be like? I wanted Brian to find a loving family to take care of him. Instead Brian found the joy of caring for another. His loving action put my Christmas day agenda to shame.

Back to Brian and Pete. After high school they went to different colleges. Pete got married and Brian remained single. Both pursued their gifts. Brian is now a writer and teacher and Pete is now a film producer. Their career paths are not a surprise to me. But I did not anticipate how their interests would bring them back together again.  Unbeknownst to each other, Brian and Pete began studying the brain, mental illness and schizophrenia. Yes, that is quite the coincidence. Each have become absorbed with helping a population which is devastated by this illness. Brian spends his free time studying the latest research on neuroscience and neuropsychology. Pete spends his time gathering research for a documentary he is producing on the life of the schizophrenic which will be entered in national film festivals.

As I write, they are watching Pete's documentary and sharing what they've learned through their studies. Pete's goal is to raise awareness of the struggles for schizophrenics and their families, for his wife's brother bears that diagnosis with its daily struggles to just survive. Brian's goal is to someday write a book that makes a difference in the lives of those with mental illness. Through Brian and Pete, I am learning to appreciate the endless possibilities of what life can be for those I love and serve.

Through God's grace, he hasn't limited me. Miraculously, in him I have the capacity for becoming more than I ever thought I could be. He is slowly shaping me to become more like Jesus. Lord, give my eyes to see that capacity in others.

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